monday: did not sleep sunday night for whatever reason slumber escaped me and the pallid grey fingers of the dawn that renched me from my pit were the most unwelcome ever, but hey ho I had the return of the Hooded Claw from London too look forward to. He showed up with his two new 'instant kasabian' jackets ( more like Charles Manson) the two days I'd spent cleaning the midden from top to heel were of course wasted once he'd unpacked (read threw clothes onto bed, floor, and side of laundry basket)
tuesday: cps - bunch of failed LPCers, arse and elbow spring to mind but that would be too kind, followed by trafford centre with hong kong suey who is home for the week and renouned for the her shopping! An £18 party dress from asda for moi, don't tell anyone. Tried to contact keystone kops re The Boys assault but they were all out (taking back handers from hookers - probably)
wednesday: dental outrage - yet another x-ray at £15.50 this time I saw the new dentist who is la francais! Now I'm as zenophobic as the next man but this is really going too too far. I blame the erm, French.
thursday: awoke as usual at 6.45am and prodded the Hooded Claw and let the animals in to The Boys room before taking myself off for my morning abulisions. The Boy then recounted a tale of waking at 3am as Jake Connor Hulme nee Rose was barking and he went downstairs to see what ailed the poor wee pup. Imagine his surprise to find a pisspost on the driveway who he saw off immediately. Imagine my surprise when I opened my car door to find the fecker had slept there and vomited Chinese takeaway all over the drivers seat and steering wheel. And the stupid c-word had left his car and door keys in my car. Have a just completely crapped up my karma somewhere along the way?
saturday: I daren't go anywhere as I have suffered enough this week
sunday: The Sunday Times and perhaps a hot chocolate
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